Take a Breath, Take a Step...Here Goes

So here goes nothing, here goes everything, gotta reach for something or you'll fall for anything...what comes next, God only knows, but here goes.  -Bebo Norman

I just came across this song on Pandora and it's definitely the story of my life right now...include Matthew West's song that I posted awhile ago and that basically sums up what I'm feeling.  Our 2 year anniversary was yesterday.  Hard to believe it's only been 2 years...in a good way it feels like so much longer than that.  This past year has been full of those "here goes" moments.  The big one being the Coast Guard, and it's so true that God only knows where we'll go from here, but I'm ready and willing.  I used to hate change, but my life over the past 6 years has been nothing but that and I've become used to it...even to the point that I desire change right now.  These songs and some prodding by the Holy Spirit have made me want more in my life...more time to spend helping others, volunteering like I used to in college, more willingness to also reach out to others in their time of need, and developing new relationships with more friends (as well as taking time to devote to the friendships I have now).  I don't need more for me...giving more away is what will get me more satisfaction in my life anyways.  So that is why I'm looking forward to something new and exciting, (albeit scary and nerve wrecking) BECAUSE I won't have to spend so many hours working.  The pay and benefits Steve will receive will allow me to work part time if I want, and then I can do that volunteer work I've been missing.  This will also hopefully allow me to develop and nurture friendships that I don't seem to have the energy for lately (which makes me extremely sad).  I am ready for a challenge...God has laid all this on my heart and I am in the blocks...ready to power out and go running down the track to those kiddos and families who need my help. 

But I have to wait for the gun.  You all might be wondering why I just don't do it now...and I'm going to give the most lame (BUT ENTIRELY TRUE) excuse I can...I don't have the hours in a day to do so.  I work until 5:30 or 6 most nights...get home, eat dinner, spend time with hubby, do various household chores and relax until bed (which seems to be getting earlier...boy do I feel old) only to do it all again the next day.  Throw in Steve's training at the station, worship practice, soon to be hockey for him and volleyball for me and the week's so packed that I look forward to the weekend just to finish the chores that got neglected during the week.  I'm not complaining here...I'm just giving the facts.  And those facts show me that I need to be putting time into other things that matter outside of this world I live in.  I want to store up more treasures in heaven, and it's very hard on my spirit that I can't be doing it like I want to right now.

So yeah, I'm ready, I'm excited for the Coastie experience.  This excitement also comes in that fact that I am so proud of my husband for wanting to help our country and join the military.  I can't wait to see how God uses him in this new job.  By our time schedule we've got a little less than 5 months before he leaves for Cape May...so take a breath, take a step...here goes!